Weird Scenes Inside The Gold Mind #073: Holiday In Tehran

It’s time to taste what you most fear / Right Guard will not help you here / Brace yourself, my dear / Brace yourself, my dear – Holiday In Cambodia by the Dead Kennedys, 1980.

It was great fun watching Donald Trump and his Stooges run their victory lap yesterday. Let me paraphrase their comments: “Iran blinked.” Trump may very well be as stupid as his dangerous, but even I have a hard time believing the Great Orange Turd wasn’t knowingly lying through his teeth.

After Iran’s massive missile attacks that served as warning shots, followed by statements from Iranian leaders blatantly saying their response was just that, Trump says Iran blinked. If he really believes that, then he will continue to keep in jeopardy the lives of over 100,000 American troops – as well as that of his alleged best-bud Benji Netanyahu. Maybe Trump thinks that, since the Jews are the ones responsible for his impeachment (source: statement made January 6 by Delaware Republican Party official Nelly Jordan), he can get back to his family’s legacy of hating the Hebes so, hey, screw Benji.

Iran bombed the shit out of two of our bases in Iraq Tuesday night. They were meticulous in not killing Americans, Iranians, or (I take it) Iraqis. Then they said, and again I paraphrase, this town isn’t big enough for the two of us, and if we don’t get out or if we assassinate any more Iranian leaders, they will move their bombsites a little bit to the right and blow our troops to kingdom come. That is the textbook definition of a warning shot. Stop listening to the babblings of Trump’s lying toadies: the absolute truth is that, Wednesday night, Ayatollah Ali Khamenei made Donald Trump dance in a hail of missile fire.

According to The Hill, Defense Secretary Mark Esper, Secretary of State Mike Pompeo, CIA Director and torture chief Gina Haspel and Joint Chiefs of Staff chairman Gen. Mark Milley warned Congress that they would “embolden” Iran if our lawmakers even debated Trump’s war powers. Republican Senator Mike Lee, from Utah, said “I find this insulting and demeaning … to the office that each of the 100 senators in this building happens to hold. I find it insulting and demeaning to the Constitution of the United States.” He added that he was going to have a “conversation” with Trump about the remarks. “I find that absolutely insane. I think that’s unacceptable.”

Dela ware Jew Hater Nelly Jordan

Lee’s comments were echoed by several other Republicans who labor under our Capitol Dome, including Libertarian fountainhead Senator Rand Paul. For just about the first time ever, at least a handful of major Republicans are standing up against Trump. Senator Lee has been one of Trump’s biggest supporters.

All this is coming down as the impeachment trial is gearing up. Perhaps Iran’s Khamenei has joined most of the rest of the world in thinking that, just perhaps, Trump will either be removed from office or walk out of it so wounded he couldn’t win reelection no matter how many voters the Republicans succeed in removing from the roles. I’m hardly a military tactician (unless compared to Trump) but given the timing, I’d avoid causing permanent damage to my military options as well.

Meanwhile, Saudi Prince Khalid bin Salman said (as quoted by Reuters) “The Kingdom and its leadership always stand with brotherly Iraq and will do everything in its power to spare it the danger of war and conflict between external parties, and for its generous people to live in prosperity after what they have endured in the past.”

Anybody out here remember how World War I started?

(Thanks to Mindy Newell for the link to Nelly Jordan’s comment, to Bruce Slesinger, Jello Biafra and Klaus Flouride for writing ‘Holiday In Cambodia,’ and to Charlie Meyerson for the use of the word ‘assassinate.’)